#Last90Days by Sabrina Martelli

#Building on the theme of choosing one dream and going all in – this #Last90Days theme for our final week is based on DREAMS and what stops us. 

While it is important to learn the art of goal setting and planning, the science to achieving what you want and who you want to be has much more to do with dropping the habits that are holding you back right now IN THIS MOMENT.  Bad habits are the routine thinking and things we do both consciously and unconsciously that sabotage achieving our goals.  They are the reason now — and if you don’t address this core reason — three months, one year, five years down the road you will be bewildered, frustrated, wondering why you’re not where you want to be.

Here are some of the main roadblocks I often see with clients at Healing Path Counselling Services:

1. Stop procrastinating

Procrastination has different sources, but the big ones are around thinking small.

You look at others achieving their dreams, get into comparison thinking, think of all the reasons you’re at a disadvantage in that comparison, think of all the things you need first to get going, focus on the things that are missing, and all the reasons you can’t move forward unless such and such is in place.

You need to remove yourself from all that mind chatter. Visualize yourself stepping out of your own head and body and as a bigger version of you looking back at yourself and all that thinking and thinking. Say bye-bye to untrue thoughts by replacing them with words that enable healthy and productive thinking around your goals.

2. Stop focusing on the future

Ironically, it’s the focus on action and your very goal that’s been paralyzing you. Breathe. Take your focus off the goal itself, the steps to getting there, and back to your breath. The habit of living in the future to the neglect of being present will not get you ahead. To get ahead you will have to learn to keep your eye on the goal and live life that is happening in the HERE AND NOW.

When you bring yourself back to the now, you become so much more aware. Getting to your goal doesn’t happen by following a strict strategy or strategic plan. Your circumstance, strengths, essentially who you are, will determine how you do things.

Yes, there are tried and proven steps to achieving goals, but no two people are the same. You won’t be able to do things the very same way another person did. Bring yourself to the now, breathe and look for opportunities in the now that present themselves. They become clear to you when you step out of hustling your way into the future and breathe.

3. Stop racing after multiple goals

Anyone who has achieved their big dream goal will tell you that they had to develop laser sharp focus. Often high achievers want to do it all at once. Rid yourself of the thought that you must do it all.

Some things are wonderful to have and do, but for the next months or few years they have to go. Maybe they were never truly in alignment with your ultimate dream goal and to live true abundance, joy, meaning and impact.

Ask yourself, is doing such and such going to support my dream goal or is it a distraction for a purpose that in fact takes me away from my ultimate purpose and goal. Remember, we can have quite a few great goals but to put in the energy, time and investment will mean a distraction from the big one. We can’t do it all at once. We are human.

4. Stop perfectionism

Perfectionism keeps you frozen. It’s rooted in fear of not achieving your goal or doing things well enough. Perfectionists get easily distracted in the detail and lose sight of the big picture. Details are important but they become your Achilles heal when you allow them to hinder the real progress you need to be making.

Fear of getting it wrong will creep up continuously. Tell fear where to go. Literally. Breathe and take that step forward, regardless. If you make a mistake, forgive yourself, learn and take another step forward. It’s okay to stumble and fall. Anyone who has achieved something incredible made quite a few mistakes to get to their ultimate dream goal.

When you focus on perfection, you are blind to innovation, are at risk of beginning to hate the whole goal and what you’re doing to get to it, and sabotage ever seeing light at the end of the tunnel.

5.Stop focusing on the past

You are growing into a bigger version of yourself in order to achieve that big goal. You grow into the level of being, acting and thinking that supports the energy of your goal.  When you focus on who you’ve been in the past, your failures and what others have claimed as your limits, you freeze. Forgive yourself, and forgive others. Free yourself from their chains and your own chains. Truly, truly find it in your heart to forgive. Set aside time to meditate on forgiving transgressions and mistakes. You are doing yourself and your ability to do great things the chance you need and deserve.

You are growing, learning, and so worthy of your amazing goal. If you have a dream in your heart, I fully believe it is planted in your heart because it is yours to be and to have. Now you have to step out of the old energy that’s held you stuck and step into and breathe the larger version of you. Stop the habit of reliving the past over and over. Make a decision to close that chapter through forgiveness.  “Stop living in the past. The only thing we should do about what happened yesterday is to learn from it. Yesterday, good or bad, is history. Tomorrow is a dream, a hope, a passion. Don’t let your history destroy your dream” (Edwin Mamerto).

Please reach out anytime at Healing Path Counselling Services.

#dreams #success #healingpath #selfreflection #healthinmindbodyspirit

#personaldevelopment #lifecoach #cbt

#cognitivebehaviouraltherapy

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